Fido v The World

Urban wildlife encounters in three parts:

Part One - Sprayed

Before I even saw him, I could smell Brownie. The whole clinic could smell Brownie. Probably the neighbours could smell Brownie. Maybe even the people driving by on Portage Avenue could smell Brownie. But Brownie didn't care. He was still the same old happy tail wagging chocolate Lab we loved, or at least we used to love until he came in and made everyone go, "Oh my God! What is that smell? Is that skunk??"

Yes, it was. Brownie had been skunked. He may not have cared but his owner was in a state of some considerable distress. She kept apologizing for bringing him in, but she didn't want him in the house and he had met the skunk in the yard, so she didn't want him there either until she was sure that it was safe, and it was a hot summer day, so she couldn't leave him in the car. The only place left to go was the clinic, where she was desperately hoping we could help. We did have "Skunk-Off" in stock, so a brave vet tech put on a large smock and led Brownie, tail still wagging, to a distant room to apply it. Brownie was lucky because he hadn't gotten it in the eyes, where it can be quite irritating, and he was lucky because he was up to date on rabies vaccines and it didn't look like he had actually come in direct contact with the skunk. Skunks are the most common carriers of rabies in Manitoba.

Now some of you, especially those of my generation and older, will be thinking about all those old classic television shows where skunked dogs were bathed in tomato juice. Don't do it. First of all, it is easily more expensive than an enzymatic cleaner, secondly, it is ridiculously messy, and thirdly it doesn't actually work. It only seems to work because of something called olfactory fatigue wherein your nose has become overwhelmed by the combined tomato-skunk stench and calls it quits. Anyone new encountering the dog will still smell the skunk until their nose packs it in too. And then the competing tomato smell wears off and you have a pink stinky dog. If you really need a home remedy, the recipe you'll see online for 3% peroxide, baking soda and dishwashing soap does work. (If you're reading this you presumably have internet access, so just Google "skunk spray peroxide recipe" for detailed instructions.)

But on the plus side you and your dog have been exposed to a marvel of nature. Skunks can spray three metres from their little anal sac nozzles, their spray odour can be detected up to 5 km away and it only takes 10 parts per billion to make a stink. So mix a little wonder into your horror.


Part Two - Poked

In porcupine country, every clinic has these. In the city perhaps only one or two, but in rural areas probably quite a few. I'm talking about "quill dogs". We call them quill dogs because there appears to be a circuit in the canine brain that is dedicated to solving The Mystery of the Spiky Beast. You would think that getting a faceful of quills would be a deterrent to approaching the Spiky Beast again, and that's certainly what said beast intends, but to a quill dog, this is just a mystery that absolutely needs to be solved. A puzzle that needs to be figured out. An enigmatic opponent who needs to be bested. And this mystery is almost never solved. The Spiky Beast almost always makes a getaway.

The practical consequence of all this is that these quill dogs will present again and again to the vet to have the quills removed. This is rarely medically serious, but it is often a significant nuisance. On the rare occasions where it is serious, it is because a quill has gotten in the eye, or deep in the throat. In even more rare occasions they can migrate deeper into the body. Usually though it's just a matter of giving the poor bewildered dog an anesthetic and painstakingly searching for the quills. Once you find them they're easy to remove. "Once you find them..." Please do not be upset at your vet if he or she missed a few quills! Ones that have broken off at the surface can be very difficult to find. And please do not consider this a DIY project - you will miss far more if your dog is not sedated or anesthetized, and it will be painful.

On the upside, porcupine quills are coated in an antibiotic substance. We will still often prescribe an antibiotic as a precaution, but getting quilled leads to far less infection than you might expect. You might wonder why the porcupine is being so kind to others? It's not. It's being kind to itself because the animal most commonly poked by a porcupine is the porcupine itself when it accidentally falls out of a tree! This is more common than you might think. They are not especially elegant creatures.

And before we move on to Part Three I want to dispell a porcupine myth. They cannot shoot or even toss their quills. What they can do is jump very quickly towards their opponent and then lash out with their tail before jumping away again. Not elegant, but lightning fast.


Part Three - Chomped

As the saying goes, there's a first time for everything. And I suspect that this may also be the last time I see something like this. Mrs Bernard brought Duffy, her beautiful golden retriever, in after he had fought with a beaver and lost. He had a set of perfectly chisel shaped puncture wounds on his paw. Yes, a beaver. Yes, fighting with it and losing. And yes, right here in the city of Winnipeg.

So let's unpack that.

Last thing first. Winnipeg is a city of rivers and streams and beavers are actually quite plentiful here. They keep to themselves though and I suspect that the majority of Winnipeggers have never seen one, but if they walk their dogs near these rivers and streams, their dogs almost certainly have smelled them and are almost certainly intrigued. Well, Duffy was intrigued. He was intrigued enough to dive into the creek and investigate the source of that smell.

This brings me to the next thing, beavers and fighting. There is a general prejudice about beavers that they are amiable but dull-witted. People have a cartoon image of a good-natured, hard-working, basically passive animal going about its business without paying attention to much else. Well, they are hard-working, but they are as mentally sharp as any rodent and they are only amiable, good-natured and passive if you leave them alone. Duffy did not leave the beaver alone. The beaver tried to swim away, but Duffy followed until they got close to the lodge when the beaver decided to make a stand. It whipped around and chomped the surprised dog on the paw. It was a one-sided fight. Duffy may have intended to bite the beaver, but quickly changed his mind and splashed back to his shocked owner.

In 2013 a beaver attacked a 60-year-old fisherman in Belarus. The bite severed an artery and the man died. Kind of gives you new respect for our supposedly comical national animal...